One summer night Gina and her husband, while their kids were sleeping, drove to the Taylor Airport. It was a single landing strip in a pasture next to a gray steel building and a few scattered hangars for the ranchers' planes. Hank cut the lights and parked behind one of the hangars, and Gina looked back to see if there were any car lights on the county road, anyone who could have seen them go in. All she saw were the blank outlines of the mountains against the night sky.
The landing strip was butter smooth, out of place compared to the dirt roads they took to get there. They lay down in the exact middle of the strip, head to head. Gina's feet pointed towards the west, Hank's to the east. Their shoulders were each other's pillows. The stars were brutally bright, almost blinding. On her back, her cheek nuzzling Hank's, the only thing in Gina's field of vision was the sky and the blinking tower light that functioned to signal planes. She had the sudden urge to take all of her clothes off.
It felt as if the earth were pulling her down and the stars were pulling her up. Floating. She touched the asphalt with her palms to anchor herself. Hank began murmuring about the days before the kids were born and reached back to cup her face in his hand.
They left the landing strip to have sex in the grass next to the car. Gina got earth and grass in her fingernails.
Gina was reminded of the time she posted an ad to Craig's list that her dog and her children were for sale and that all reasonable offers would be considered. She had stopped to post it in the middle of cleaning the downstairs bathroom, while they still lived in the city.
They saw headlights and heard a car passing in the distance. Hank helped her put her shirt back on and she leaned into his hug as they pressed themselves against the building and giggled. The car passed and they returned to their position on the landing strip, feeling the pull of the stars until they were ready to return home.
Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts
Thursday, November 28, 2013
Sunday, November 20, 2011
The Old Man
We fit together/ without a thought. You step to/ the blurred edge to breathe
This is the way it's always been, before I was born. I had your children and we lived together. I picked fights with you knowing your only reaction would be muted amusement. We're each other's wallpaper.
At times you're so delicious I want to bite you. When we hold hands I ignore you completely, I forget you as I stroke your thumb. Sometimes the most important part of you is your schedule.
You don't complete me. I don't complete you. We are whole without each other. We use each other in a most wonderful way.
This is the way it's always been, before I was born. I had your children and we lived together. I picked fights with you knowing your only reaction would be muted amusement. We're each other's wallpaper.
At times you're so delicious I want to bite you. When we hold hands I ignore you completely, I forget you as I stroke your thumb. Sometimes the most important part of you is your schedule.
You don't complete me. I don't complete you. We are whole without each other. We use each other in a most wonderful way.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Living Together
LIVING TOGETHER
COHABITATION AGREEMENT
Crazy Coppertop, Cohabitant No. 1, and The Old Man, Cohabitant No. 2, hereinafter jointly referred to as the Cohabitants, who now live together, hereby agree as follows:
1. The Cohabitants wish to establish their respective rights and responsibilities regarding each other’s emotional baggage and property and the emotional baggage and property that may be acquired, either separately or together, during the period of cohabitation.
2. The Cohabitants have made a full and complete disclosure to each other of all of their current emotional and mental liabilities.
3. Except as otherwise provided below, the Cohabitants waive the following rights:
a. To keep a list of “what he does” and “what she does” in order to bring it up at a later date.
b. To expect Holidays, birthdays and all such celebrations to be relaxing, joyous affairs.
c. To complain when Thanksgiving is celebrated at The Golden Corral buffet restaurant.
d. To any expectation of freedom from sarcastic comments when the other party is watching “their show.”
e. To waive subjection to any mental or emotional scars acquired during the course of parenthood, whether currently held or hereafter acquired.
f. To any expectation of private solitude on a regular basis or any expectation of pursuing “hobbies” that satisfy either parties’ interests and mental sanity.
g. To any expectation to “party it up” or dance at any sort of celebration unless they are stinking drunk.
4. RELEVANT EXCEPTIONS TO PARAGRAPH 3 ABOVE:
a. An unspoken running list that is emotionally suppressed may be kept by both parties.
b. Unspoken high expectations may be kept emotionally suppressed.
c. Complaints about the quality of food are acceptable; however, complaints about the physical presence of the family in a buffet restaurant on such a day are not.
d. No exceptions.
e. No exceptions.
f. Hobbies may be pursued covertly and with great shame and guilt.
g. No exceptions.
5. Cohabitant No. 1 is responsible for the following: Laundry, bathroom cleaning (except Cohabitant No. 2’s bathroom,) floor cleaning, washing sheets, pulling weeds, watering the garden, categorization and organization of household goods, remembering family birthdays and then reminding Cohabitant No. 2 that she will not in any circumstance take responsibility for gift-buying for said birthdays, scheduling doctor’s appointments for the children, completing school paperwork, suppressing her high expectations for holiday celebrations, planning meals, grocery shopping, and taking care of the emotional health of the entire family.
Cohabitant No. 2 is responsible for the following: mowing the lawn, killing the bugs that eat the lawn, standing at the window worrying about the bugs that are eating the lawn, making dinner, doing the dishes, performing repairs around the house, grilling, listening intently and quietly as Cohabitant No. 1 vents about her job five or six days a week, planning one vacation per year to ensure that both parties find immense satisfaction from being away from the kids, and understanding exactly why Cohabitant No. 1 “loses it and goes crazy” and reacting correctly. (Note: the definition of “correctly” can only be determined by Cohabitant No. 1 and will forever remain a secret.)
6. The Cohabitants have separate income and assets to independently provide for their own respective financial needs and materials that support any “hobbies” that may be attempted.
9. This agreement constitutes the entire agreement of the parties and may be modified only in a writing executed by both Cohabitants.
10. In the event Cohabitant No. 1 is unable to abide by this agreement and "loses it" she will refer to a "love letter" written by Cohabitant No. 2 addressed to her in October of 2008 in which he states fairly clearly why he loves her. If Cohabitant No. 2 fails to produce another love letter in three to five years Cohabitant No. 1 may request a re-drafting of the above agreement.
I HAVE READ THE ABOVE AGREEMENT, I HAVE TAKEN TIME TO CONSIDER ITS IMPLICATIONS IN LIGHT OF THE FACT THAT FOREVER IS A LONG TIME, I FULLY UNDERSTAND ITS CONTENTS, I AGREE TO ITS TERMS, AND I VOLUNTARILY SUBMIT TO ITS EXECUTION.
____________________________________ ______________________________
Cohabitant No. 1 Cohabitant No. 2
COHABITATION AGREEMENT
Crazy Coppertop, Cohabitant No. 1, and The Old Man, Cohabitant No. 2, hereinafter jointly referred to as the Cohabitants, who now live together, hereby agree as follows:
1. The Cohabitants wish to establish their respective rights and responsibilities regarding each other’s emotional baggage and property and the emotional baggage and property that may be acquired, either separately or together, during the period of cohabitation.
2. The Cohabitants have made a full and complete disclosure to each other of all of their current emotional and mental liabilities.
3. Except as otherwise provided below, the Cohabitants waive the following rights:
a. To keep a list of “what he does” and “what she does” in order to bring it up at a later date.
b. To expect Holidays, birthdays and all such celebrations to be relaxing, joyous affairs.
c. To complain when Thanksgiving is celebrated at The Golden Corral buffet restaurant.
d. To any expectation of freedom from sarcastic comments when the other party is watching “their show.”
e. To waive subjection to any mental or emotional scars acquired during the course of parenthood, whether currently held or hereafter acquired.
f. To any expectation of private solitude on a regular basis or any expectation of pursuing “hobbies” that satisfy either parties’ interests and mental sanity.
g. To any expectation to “party it up” or dance at any sort of celebration unless they are stinking drunk.
4. RELEVANT EXCEPTIONS TO PARAGRAPH 3 ABOVE:
a. An unspoken running list that is emotionally suppressed may be kept by both parties.
b. Unspoken high expectations may be kept emotionally suppressed.
c. Complaints about the quality of food are acceptable; however, complaints about the physical presence of the family in a buffet restaurant on such a day are not.
d. No exceptions.
e. No exceptions.
f. Hobbies may be pursued covertly and with great shame and guilt.
g. No exceptions.
5. Cohabitant No. 1 is responsible for the following: Laundry, bathroom cleaning (except Cohabitant No. 2’s bathroom,) floor cleaning, washing sheets, pulling weeds, watering the garden, categorization and organization of household goods, remembering family birthdays and then reminding Cohabitant No. 2 that she will not in any circumstance take responsibility for gift-buying for said birthdays, scheduling doctor’s appointments for the children, completing school paperwork, suppressing her high expectations for holiday celebrations, planning meals, grocery shopping, and taking care of the emotional health of the entire family.
Cohabitant No. 2 is responsible for the following: mowing the lawn, killing the bugs that eat the lawn, standing at the window worrying about the bugs that are eating the lawn, making dinner, doing the dishes, performing repairs around the house, grilling, listening intently and quietly as Cohabitant No. 1 vents about her job five or six days a week, planning one vacation per year to ensure that both parties find immense satisfaction from being away from the kids, and understanding exactly why Cohabitant No. 1 “loses it and goes crazy” and reacting correctly. (Note: the definition of “correctly” can only be determined by Cohabitant No. 1 and will forever remain a secret.)
6. The Cohabitants have separate income and assets to independently provide for their own respective financial needs and materials that support any “hobbies” that may be attempted.
9. This agreement constitutes the entire agreement of the parties and may be modified only in a writing executed by both Cohabitants.
10. In the event Cohabitant No. 1 is unable to abide by this agreement and "loses it" she will refer to a "love letter" written by Cohabitant No. 2 addressed to her in October of 2008 in which he states fairly clearly why he loves her. If Cohabitant No. 2 fails to produce another love letter in three to five years Cohabitant No. 1 may request a re-drafting of the above agreement.
I HAVE READ THE ABOVE AGREEMENT, I HAVE TAKEN TIME TO CONSIDER ITS IMPLICATIONS IN LIGHT OF THE FACT THAT FOREVER IS A LONG TIME, I FULLY UNDERSTAND ITS CONTENTS, I AGREE TO ITS TERMS, AND I VOLUNTARILY SUBMIT TO ITS EXECUTION.
____________________________________ ______________________________
Cohabitant No. 1 Cohabitant No. 2
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